One of my deepest fears is apathy and emotional deadness. I was like that for too long. I became lusty and hungry, a monster who couldn’t love, yet seethed with lust and desire. The only emotion I felt was anger, and there was an abundance of it.
I don’t run from my emotions. I embrace them, indulge them, work through them. I pore over every emotion, every weakness, every wound, and bring it to the surface to look it in the face. And I conquer. The phoenix becomes more and more and more fiery until finally it explodes in some form of catharsis, release; music, a novel, a workout. Then I am born again, innocent.